This was a real conversation the captain and I had just before he left on his latest assignment.
“Where’s your Super Glue?”
“What did you break?”
“Why don’t you just throw it away?”
“It’s one of my favorites.”
“Who glues seashells, I mean who does that?”
“Why are you giving me a problem about this?”
“Because you have at least a thousand of them that look just like that.”
“Who are you, the seashell police?”
“I mean, really, why glue a broken shell. Who does that?”
“You said that already. You should get some new material. I hear what you’re saying, but I could still use it someday, it came from that dumpster in Nantucket, remember the one that had mounds of scallop shells around it?”
“Yeah and remember it was raining and freezing and I found a plastic bag on the beach and filled it up with shells and wanted to come back with a box and you told me that I had enough and I was bordering the line over to crazy and I said enough was when I had them ALL, and you made me leave, remember?”
He gives me a look.
“Well…if you had let me take as many as I wanted (all of them), I wouldn’t be so attached to this one but you made me leave all of his brothers and sisters behind so I feel obligated to rescue this little guy.”
‘What are you looking like that for? You knew I was like this twenty years ago; it’s not like this is new information. Stop stalling and hand over the glue.”
“Why don’t you use your glue gun?”
“OMG, what is your problem! Cos its not as precise and…geez. why are you giving me such a hard time? Are you like a prosecuting attorney or something? Maybe you missed your calling; you could quit being a captain and go to law school.”
There’s that look again.
“OK, you are trying my last nerve. Just hand over the glue before you get hurt or you’re not gonna get buckwheat pancakes for breakfast!”
“Here ya go, just don’t glue your fingers together like you did last time.”
This is what it’s like around here. Do you see why people say we’re like two peas in a pod?