I guess my life’s not so bad. I haven’t done an Anne Hathaway or a Brit-ney. Ever. My lady parts haven’t ever been introduced to the world that way. Not yet, anyway. I even had a c-section; no human being has even luged down that tunnel. But who knows what I’ll do to get more blog or Twitter followers! Seriously, Anne, gurllfriend. Please wear undies or keep your legs together–or both. Pull-eaze. Have you ever done the “look in the mirror” thing to get in touch with your femaleness? Ick.
Actually, it was a disaster coming and going. I thought Rachael Zoe was her stylist. Was Rach too busy at QVC to care about that important deet? Who put that parachute on her back? It was a Tom Ford gown and he designed the bondage shoes, too. They say he used vegan leather. Are you telling me a poor carrot or a poor eggplant died so Anne could have a pair of shoes?
So…you might remember a while back when all the planets were aligned for me and I got the vintage Valentino and that handbag, and I was skipping through my days throwing a little enchanted fairy dust to the right and to the left, la la la. Well, it all came to a crashing halt.
That’ll be on tomorrow’s installment of Enchanted Confessions. Stay tuned–
- Anne Hathaway’s Vegan Tom Ford Boots: A Multi-Zoom Analysis (nymag.com)
- Um, Huh?! Anne Hathaway Tries to be Way Too Edgy in a Bondage-Inspired Tom Ford Look (news.stylecaster.com)
- Anne Hathaway Vagina Flash of the Day (drunkenstepfather.com)
- Anne Hathaway’s Coochie Hair Made An Appearance Last Night, But More Importantly What Are Those Boots?! (dlisted.com)