Woke up to this terse email from my tugboat man:
P.S. What he means by “go in” is sailing into a safe port, but now the weather is swirling all around him, and best practices dictate staying offshore. Oh, and “shitty” is a mariner term too haha.
I’m pretty sure I can speak for most mariner spouses when I say that we’re not completely calm unless our guys are on land — terra firma — and in our sightline.
There are just so many variables out there on the water; like that routine voyage from Jacksonville to Puerto Rico, which my hub has done a zillion times—can be fraught with danger.
IF everything goes wrong. Not just one or two things, but as in the case of El Faro, EVERYthing went wrong. Loss of engine power, taking on water, steering directly into the eye of the hurricane. Like that.
I checked the National Weather Service offshore waters forecast for the area he’s in and it’s not great: high seas and strong to GALE FORCE winds with a late hurricane season disturbance.
In mariner terms, winds are categorized on the Beaufort Scale. Here’s a graphic:
Even though I know he’s the BEST captain in the world-
Even though I know he’s the SAFEST captain in the world-
Even though I know he’s been through dozens of bad storms all over the world-
Even though I know all of that, the El Faro tragedy is so fresh in our minds that it causes more worry.
I keep the boat phone handy—just in case.
I monitor the weather—just in case.
I put the company phone number on speed dial—just in case.
The worry is a constant thread that runs right along with all my other thoughts.
Like keeping a tab open on the computer and refreshing it every couple of seconds.
The worry is there at the gym during an (amazing) kickboxing class.
The worry is there grocery shopping.
Watching television can’t drown it out, nor does reading a book. (Poor choice of words.)
It’s very stressful, and when retail therapy doesn’t work its magic, you KNOW I’m super worried.
Tugs are very sturdy vessels; I’m sure he will be FINE.
After all, we have to decorate the nursery, right?
To all the mariners out on the high seas, be extra careful.
And a little merchant mariner humor…
My heart and prayers are with you. I identify with your concerns and they seem much the same as any military wife/mother/sister/lover has when their soldier enters into yet another deployment or even these days, a training mission. We have no guarantees and pray God will send them home to us.
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Too true, too much reality. Thank you 🙂
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Very well expressed. I wonder when we will feel less on “alert”. Safe travels for all mariners.
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Thank you, and I wonder that too. Def sending good vibes to all who travel the oceans.
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I have to say that, before I started following your blog, I never thought much about the men and women out on the water. Now, I say a little prayer for all of them.
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Thank you!!! The oceans are vast and Mother Nature rules. You can have all the technology and it doesn’t mean a thing.
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I can only imagine how worrying his work must be. I used to worry all the time and Garry was merely dealing with crazy people and blizzards, not an angry ocean. Someday you’ll both be happily retired, and all of this will make great stories to tell around the dinner table 🙂
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Yes, that will be nice, and we’ll be surrounded by our one grandchild haha.
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Wonderfully written. . . you expressed very clearly and beautifully (that might be the right word) what it’s like to be a mariner’s spouse when the weather is lousy.
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That’s very kind, thank you.Mine is fine; he just emailed, but the same things that go right most of the time can go wrong in the blink of an eye. So we worry.
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I sure can understand your worry. It can’t be easy until he arrives home. Thinking of you!!
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Good thoughts are always welcome! He’s doing fine, but you’re right, I won’t be truly happy until he’s sitting right next to me!
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You know the hymn..Eternal father strong to save….the familles of lifeboat crews had this sung when their men went out to rescue vessels in danger
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No, I didn’t know that hymn (actually don’t know any of them, wasn’t raised with religion even though my grandfather was a rabbi) but it’s nice to know things like that give comfort to those that believe.
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Thanks for expressing this. My husband is also a tug captain on the Jax to PR run. He got caught in Hurricane Joaquim and I received “the call” that they had their bailout bags ready and had called the CG. They were able to restore power and were able to get out of there but it was the worst day of my life. Then El Faro and knowing they weren’t as lucky. I don’t realize how much I worry until he comes home and I actually relax. Thanks for expressing this for those of us who usually keep it bottled up and put on the brave face for the rest of the world that has no idea.
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Oh my goodness, you gave me CHILLS. That CALL. You poor thing. You must have been so worried and I’m so happy everything worked out. I’ve never experienced it and I so appreciate your comment sharing such a scary event. Is your hub home now? My hub is in really bad weather now but he says he’s OK, no danger, just “uncomfortable”. Please keep in touch!
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Thanks! I will. I’m loving your blog. He’s home now and our big plans involve doing “nothing”. 🙂 I hope your hubs is out of the weather soon.
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Home is best, I know!!!:) One day he emails that weather looks better and the next it’s getting bad again, now I checked the forecast and it’s supposed to be unusually bad all next week so he’s stuck because it’s too windy to safely pass off this barge he’s towing. So we all wait…
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