Whether you’re a parent or a grandparent, never ever forget that children absolutely absorb our words, positive AND negative.
If your goal is to raise happy, healthy, empowered, imaginative THINKERS, remember that every word you say to them becomes ingrained in their fertile brains and becomes a part of their belief system.
Although I really and truly believe this and it’s been my lifelong philosophy (minus a few weeks of Angel Boy’s angst-filled teenage years), this was reinforced yesterday in the most casual and BEST way.
During one of my FaceTime calls with T, he said, “Grandma, I’m gonna flip the phone and show you this. You’ll think it’s amazing, I know you will.”
He flipped the camera to show me a crystal that his other grandma sent to him.
“Can you believe how sparkly it is, Grandma? I’ll save it to show you after the virus.”
(It seems as if now everything is always “after the virus.”)
Then, wait for it,…wait for it…he says,
“Oh, I almost forgot. I’ll flip back. Here I am, Grandma. Here’s your beautiful boy.”
He smiled at me with his daddy’s Imperial jade green eyes and those curls that have a life of their own.
Without a trace of humor or artifice, he was very simply repeating exactly what I said a zillion times, “Could you please flip the phone back so I can see my beautiful boy?”
And when he does, I say, “Oh, good. there you are. That’s who I want to see; my beautiful boy!”
He ABSORBED the positive affirmation–and knows deep inside where it counts–that he is my beautiful and smart and very loved little boy. He KNOWS he is valued for being who he is, not for any accomplishments, but simply for existing.
Haha, my work here is done. He is truly and beautifully empowered, inside and out.
Here’s an easy-to-save graphic with a few important positive affirmations for our children and for ourselves.

I love this! When my son was young, I tried to always see the good in him, knowing that when his behavior deteriorated, it was never because he was bad. I often called him amazing, and heard it back a time or two. Isn’t it so gratifying when the years of work pay off?
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So much! It’s so hard when they act like little shits (LO:L) but like you said, we need to remember who they are, and they’re NOT their acting out behaviors. They are never bad, I agree, I like to say they make “poor choices” and we can always try again.
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This story reminds me of my youngest, when she was about four years old and she’d got into bed beside me one morning. I was still really tired and we didn’t have to get up yet.
She said, “Mama please turn around, I can’t see your beautiful face.” I almost cried.
Awesome story about your grandson.
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Now THAT is the kind of memory that would make me happy for the rest of my life. Thank you so much for sharing! Exactly what I’m talking about. xx
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It was such a beautiful thing to hear.
🌞
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It makes my heart happy just to hear it!
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