Day of Reckoning | Doomsday

I’ve had a really tough last few days. My WiFi broke on Thursday– I mean really broke. and there was nothing that the telephone tech could do to fix it so I had to schedule an appointment for a real, live human to appear in person.

The even worse news is that no one can come until Tuesday. TUESDAY.

That’s a lifetime, right? Nowadays, to be without internet access grinds our lives to a complete stop. I’m not sure that it’s a great idea to be so reliant on this technology.

I thought I was really smart and tethered my computer to my phone’s cellular data until I got the message that I was using too much data, so I had to untether…unplug completely.

In some ways, this really feels like the end; doomsday, my own personal day of reckoning. I guess I didn’t realize how totally dependent I’ve become on the internet — in every aspect of my life. I confess that I felt a level of anxiety, stressed out because it was as if I was marooned on a desert island, cut off from the rest of the world.

I was lucky enough to still have a radio because I couldn’t listen to music any other way. It was like turning the clock back more than thirty years.

No computer, no social media.

I had disconnected from cable TV a while ago but no WiFi meant that I didn’t have Prime or Netflix or Roku and I was stuck with only a handful of local stations. Crazy.

I found a couple books to read but it didn’t take me very long to finish both of them. I polished all the furniture, I washed windows, I cleaned out the refrigerator. I worked in the garden. I actually got a lot done, much more than if I had wasted time on the internet.

Psychology Today says excessive use of the internet is known to negatively impact a person’s mental health. It has been associated with mental health issues, such as loneliness, depression, anxiety, and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. Cybersex and pornography hurts our minds, souls, and relationships in so many ways — it’s incredibly sad.

While the internet has completely revolutionized the way we live and work in the modern world and opened up opportunities, it’s also closed the world. I believe that, too.

The internet transformed communication, information dissemination, commerce, education, and social interactions in unprecedented ways, reimagining the way we live, work, and interact with one another.

In the old days, we used typewriters to write papers or letters — or we hand wrote them. If we wanted to read a book, we went to library — or the bookstore. There were no e-readers or digital downloads.

If we wanted to hear a song, we listened to it on the radio or we bought a vinyl record, tape, or disk.

If we wanted to watch a movie, we either went to the movie theater or watched whatever came on television, and later we had Blockbuster to rent movies, remember that?

Upon reflection (since I’ve had a lot of time to THINK) I think life was better because there was more one-on-one interaction. Being alive didn’t feel as disposable as it does now. We didn’t expect everything to happen instantaneously. We didn’t give up as easily on things. We didn’t discard things as quickly. We learned how to take care of them and mend them if they broke. We didn’t feel the need to rush out and buy the latest new thing that was being sold, and then obsessively track its every delivery movement. (That’s me.)

It hasn’t been easy, that’s for sure. I only lasted three days before I packed up my laptop and drove to the (empty) city parking lot to access their free internet.

This is where I am right now, sitting in my car, typing away on their signal. After this, I think I might hit up Amazon and look for a new table runner to accent my now beautifully polished and shiny dining room table.

The pain is real. How long could YOU last unplugged?

Bizarre Eclipse DREAMS | Snakes and Cats

All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.
— Edgar Allen Poe

So far, the world seems to have survived the solar eclipse, but on a personal level, my dream state have gone on a path of complete totality — into the BIZARRE.

First, as I was drifting off to sleep in that precarious and precious few moments called hypnagogia, the transitional state of consciousness between wakefulness and sleep, I felt my kitty daughter Bandit jump on the bed right next to me. I mean, I literally and truly FELT her body. This has happened during several lucid dreams, but NEVER as I’m stuck in limbo between two worlds. I know I’ve said it before…my Bandit died many years ago, so whatever/whoever jumped on my bed wasn’t actually Bandit, but her spirit.

Just like before, it totally freaked me out because it felt so REAL. Anyway, to rule out it wasn’t some other sort of creature (ick), I turned on the lamp next to my bed and there was nothing.

The light broke the spell of reconnection, but as Bandit jumped on me, I remember she asked a question, the same one she asked the last time I had a nocturnal visit. I responded exactly the same way I had during the lucid dream, “I don’t know, baby girl. I don’t know.”

I went to sleep after that –no more dreams about Bandit — BUT the last dream I recall is pretty unsettling. I dreamed that my nose was stuffed up. When I found a tissue to blow my nose, a bunch of snakes emerged, but only from the left side. (Gross, right?) They were quite small, mostly black with a white line running down the length of their bodies. Details, yuck! I continued to blow my nose and more snakes emerged, until I forced myself to wake up because OMG, I couldn’t let my subconscious continue on this strange path (of reptile totality).

My heart was RACING and you can be sure I doublechecked the comforter and sheets to make sure that I wasn’t lying in a nest of snakes. EWWW.

After a cup of coffee, I started researching snakes coming out of nose and to my complete surprise, it’s not at all uncommon. EWWW again.

There are way too many interpretations of snakes coming out one’s nose to determine whether my dream was good or bad, so I choose to believe the more positive explanations:

“Sometimes it can symbolize transformation, rebirth, and renewal. Dreaming about a snake crawling out of your body could be a sign that something hidden, or something that has been repressed, is coming out into the open. It could also be a sign of a transformation or a new beginning.”

“It might symbolize personal empowerment. You are striving for goals that seem beyond your reach. You are receptive to change. It also points at the moon, intuition, and the feminine aspects of yourself. You will play an integral role in an important upcoming project. Your dream is a metaphor for great harmony and heightened awareness toward some situation.”

Thank you very much, SOLAR ECLIPSE, for the strange ramblings of my subconscious. As much as I love to feel the poignant presence of my kitty daughter, it breaks my heart that she’s no longer alive. With regard to the snakes dream, I’m shaking my head. I have no earthly idea where that scenario came from. I’m not afraid of snakes (except rattlers) so it’s not like I have an ingrained snake phobia or anything like that.

Oh well…it’s a bright new day, and much too beautiful to dwell in the shadowy recesses of my submerged mind.

Dream info curated from Dreams Directory and Dreamopedia.

Novalunosis: Word of the Day

“The universe and the light of the stars come through me.” — Rumi

Novalunosis (n.) – The state of relaxation and wonderment experienced while gazing upon the stars.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

There’s some online discussion regarding whether or not novalunosis is a “real” word, but there’s no disagreement about the feeling of looking up in wonderment at the night sky.

Is Earth the only inhabited planet? With the vastness of the unexplored cosmos, is it even possible to think we are the only living, breathing, sentient creatures?

It’s an overwhelming feeling; novalunosis, but it can spark deep thoughts and conversations about infinity and the cosmos.

The Cosmos is all that is or was or ever will be. Our feeblest contemplations of the Cosmos stir us; there is a tingling in the spine, a catch in the voice, a faint sensation, as if a distant memory, of falling from a height. We know we are approaching the greatest of mysteries.
— Carl Sagan

Thanksgiving Thoughts

While we’re in the midst of plans to enjoy a feast with friends and family, I hope we don’t forget to honor, and with gratitude, recognize the Indigenous Peoples.

Will you teach your children what we have taught our children? That the earth is our mother? What befalls the earth befalls all the sons of the earth.” Chief Seattle

“When you know who you are when your mission is clear, and you burn with the inner fire of unbreakable will; no cold can touch your heart; no deluge can dampen your purpose. You know that you are alive.” – Chief Seattle, Suquamish/Duwamish (1786-1866)

Chief Seattle (more correctly known as Seathl) was a Suquamish and Duwamish chief. A leading figure among his people, he pursued a path of accommodation to white settlers, The city of Seattle in Washington state, was named after him.

Photo of people and tents and quote credit to Chief Seattle and Native Red Cloud Maȟpíya Lúta~Hińhan Wakangli. Photo credit of Chief Seattle from Wiki

Talmud Wisdom

The Talmud (study or learning) is a compilation of ancient teachings regarded as sacred by Jewish people. It’s the link between the Torah and Jewish practice and beliefs. The Talmud is also a way to see and comprehend discussions between thousands of rabbis spanning centuries before the work was compiled and put onto paper. The Talmud states that the Torah was mostly written by Moses. That’s a LOT of historical documentation to absorb and think about.

I studied both the Torah and the Talmud at Sunday and Hebrew school, even learning to read and write in Hebrew, but I remember virtually nothing. However, with recent tragic events, this quote from the Talmud seems appropriate.

(The kind of things I remember is to look at the calendar and note that Hannukah comes early this year, December 7!)

The Talmud states, “Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly now, love mercy now, walk humbly now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.”

World Kindness Day

This year’s theme for World Kindness Day is “Be Kind Wherever Possible”, to highlight the significance of kindness to be practiced all over the universe and in each part of our lives.

The motivation behind World Kindness Day is to focus on the positivity and empathy that joins all of us. A crucial part of the human experience, kindness rises above political, racial, religious, gender, and geographical limits.  

One of the themes of the Angels’ bedroom is “kindness” and I’ve hung these quotes on the wall, to persistently, if not also subliminally, get my message across.

I don’t know how many times I’ve had the same conversation with Angel Boy 2.0 about Rumi’s Three Gates, especially regarding his little sister…

Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates
At the first gate, ask yourself, “Is it true?”
At the second gate ask, “Is it necessary?”
At the third gate ask, “Is it kind?”

Best of all, Krispy Kreme is giving donuts away to the first 500, so I better leave now so I can get in line. I could use some of that sort of kindness!

Be kind to ourselves, and be kind to others.

Virtue Signaling

Virtue signaling: a public expression of opinions or sentiments intended to demonstrate one’s good character or social conscience or the moral correctness of one’s position on a particular issue.

Take note of how often virtue signaling consists of saying one “hates” things.

It’s another way to convey that someone feels superior to another.

I recently experienced being victimized by virtue signaling, which I feel is REALLY annoying.

Here’s the story:

I attended an event and a couple of women and I were chatting well after it was over. We decided to get together the following week for coffee/tea and continue the conversation since it seemed as if we had common interests.

When we met, we started talking about all the usual things: our personal histories, our children, education, and what we like to do for fun.

When it was my turn to share, I mentioned how much I love to shop. For me, shopping is truly therapeutic. I don’t necessarily mean I have to spend money to reap the benefits; I enjoy looking at pretty things whether it’s for me, for someone else, or finding special presents for the Angel Kids.

And it’s the truth. While I love to garden and bake (for the kids) and a (sometime) community activist, going to stores brings joy.

Well…my innocent confession set off a chain of negative comments…”I hate shopping.” “I never shop if I can help it.” “Shopping is a waste of time.” “I wear my clothes until they’re worn out like rags.”

Virtue signaling 101.

“Shopping is buying into the patriarchy.” OKAY, they didn’t actually go that far, but the spewing of hatred for my pastime wasn’t very nice at all. I felt personally attacked.

What I detected by those comments was their close-minded conspicuous, self-righteous, lofty, superior moral viewpoint with the intent of communicating their BETTER-than-me attitude.

The subtext was that I was a frivolous naive one-dimensional superficial fairy-like creature who doesn’t dwell nearly enough on the somber, grim, seriousness of life. Like they do.

To look down on someone with disdain and contempt for sharing what they do as a leisure activity or distraction is judgmental and close-minded.

I didn’t ridicule THEM for NOT liking retail therapy, although the snarky side of me privately thought that they could both benefit from some (teehee).

I have found this experience to be something I’ve endured several times in my life, and recently. It’s like a moral badge of righteousness for some women to declare how much they hate shopping. “I don’t shop.” “I don’t care what I wear.”

Well, I DO. I love treasures and bargains as much as l love to look at Gucci handbags and Chanel jewelry, not with envy and longing, but with appreciation for the beauty of the craft.

The lesson I learned that day was that I didn’t really have anything in common with mean-spirited people, so they won’t be my new BFFs and I won’t be joining them again for coffee. That wasn’t the only personality difference, though. They had detached parenting styles while mine is more drone-like and very much attached. Their own parents weren’t like mine; they both had complicated and angry issues with their mothers and lots of complaints. I couldn’t relate as mine has been dead for a long time but I miss her every day.

Rant over. I’m going shopping now.

Reading is EVERYTHING

“A child who reads will be an adult who thinks.” Unknown

I always have a book with me, my son always has books with him, and I always have books in the car.

Any time I hear, “I’m bored”, my response is “go read a book.” I said this even before he could actually READ, to encourage the good habit.

Later, I’d tell him to pick out all the sight words he’s learned; it, he, she, the, but…and then we built on those skills by sounding out other words phonetically.

I love functional reading too, and often pretend (lie) that I don’t have my glasses on so I can’t see a recipe or directions and ask him to help me out. He takes the bait every single time and that makes me very happy. To be completely accurate, almost every time. There is that one time he brought my reading glasses to me and that kinda sorta called my bluff, but I simply thanked him for finding them and found a better hiding place next time.

Even his Pokemon cards spark reading skills. “I can read this, Grandma” and I honestly didn’t believe him (there were some big words). Of course I didn’t reveal my skepticism and when he read the back of the cards, truly read them, I gave him a giant hug.

Recently, driving home from the airport with everyone in the car, we heard Angel Boy’s voice in the back seat. He had picked up one of the books I leave on the seat and was reading to his sister.

We all looked at each other in wonderment because this hadn’t happened before. Angel Girl was intently listening to the story and we were speechless with the joy of it, as we’re all big readers who know the importance of learning to read.

When the book was finished, we praised his ability and kindness toward his sister, who asked for the story to be read to her again. And he did. It was a win-win for both of them. And us.

Reading is everything.

“Reading is the gateway for children that makes all other learning possible.” – Barack Obama

Blink! Is it Magic? 🪄

At one point, Angel Boy 2.0 would often ask me to do something for him; for example, he’d ask me to reach something or make him breakfast or a snack or to play MagnaTiles, anything really, and he would become incredibly impatient if it didn’t happen RIGHT THIS MINUTE.

As an impatient type myself who wants everything RIGHT NOW, I totally understood.

Instead of getting angry or telling him to wait, I started to say, “BLINK.”

It was enough of a distraction the first time I said it that he stopped and said “WHAT?”

I repeated myself, “Blink.” I mean do it, really BLINK YOUR EYES, OK?”

He blinked and looked at me.

I said, “Did anything happen? Am I magic? Do I possess magical abilities?”

He slowly shook his head…nope. (I’m sure he thought his grandma was totally cray, and he might be right, but he was engaged and interested.)

“Well, I wish I could blink my eyes so that what you want would happen in the blink of an eye, and since it obviously did NOT, it’s going to take as long as it takes. What do you think about that?”

He laughed and I did, too.

It must have been the perfect response for him because we’ve continued the tradition.

“BLINK! Did it happen? Nope, not for me either. I’m still not magical, I guess, still only human.”

It was a more fun way to get my point across that he could be a LITTLE more patient. I think I got the idea from watching Bewitched. Although I can’t twitch my nose like Samantha, I can blink my eyes.

Angel Girl recently did the same thing as I mended a torn dress for one of her dolls. Watching me, she kept impatiently repeating, “Are you finished, are you finished, why is it taking you so long?”

“Blink, girl. Blink your eyes. Is your doll all sewn up yet?”

She blinked and shook her head while her brother nodded with all the wisdom of his 7.5 years.

“See”, I held out my hands. ” I’m not magic. These hands of mine can only sew one stitch at a time and if you want me to do a good job, it’s going to take as long as it takes.”

It’s not like I have the powers of Bianca in Wishenpoof, the story about a young fairy girl who grants children’s wishes, although SOMETIMES I do swirl my arms around and say “Whish” like she does in the show, but sadly, I’m still not magical. Not at all.

No matter how many times I blink MY eyes, I’m only human.

It’s all going to take as long as it takes. Lesson learned. 🪄

To Love and Be Loved

The greatest thing you'll ever learn 
Is just to love
And be loved in return.

I just learned the most incredibly interesting backstory about “Nature Boy”, Nat King Cole’s first big hit.

George Alexander Aberle (1908-1995), known as eden ahbez, was a songwriter and recording artist of the 1940s to 1970s, known to friends simply as ahbe.

In the late 40s, there was a rumor that there was a sort of hermit, disenchanted and disillusioned with the world, living in California in a cave under one of the Ls in the Hollywood sign.

No one really cared about this strange man until one night in 1947, he entered backstage at the Lincoln Theater in Los Angeles where Nat King Cole was playing. The man said he had something for Cole and he gave whatever he had to Cole’s manager.

Later, Cole tracked him down in New York City [no explanation about how he got from LA to NYC]. When Cole asked him where he was staying, the man declared he was staying at the best hotel in New York – outside, literally, in Central Park.

He said his name was eden ahbez (spelled all in lower-case letters). The song he gave Cole was titled “Nature Boy.” It became Cole’s first big hit, and was soon covered by other artists through the years; Frank Sinatra, Sarah Vaughan, Tony Bennett, and Lady Gaga.

The media went crazy about the mysterious man who handed Nat King Cole one of the biggest hits. Everyone tried to find out more about him.

What little they found was that he was once an orphan who never stayed at one place very long, living in various foster homes. He explained he just never fit in and was always searching for something.

“They say he wandered very far…Very far, over land and sea…”

They found out he would hop freight trains and walked across country several times, subsisting solely on raw fruits and vegetables.

“A little shy and sad of eye…But very wise was he…”

ahbez would eventually get his message out when the hippie movement began, with other artists such as Donovan, Grace Slick, and the Beach Boys’ Brian Wilson sought him out. He also wrote songs for Eartha Kitt and had another song recorded by Sam Cooke.

IIn 1974, ahbez was reported to be living in the Los Angeles suburb of Sunland. He owned a record label named Sunland Records, recording under the name “Eden Abba.” From the late 1980s until his death, ahbez worked closely with Joe Romersa, an engineer/drummer in Los Angeles. The master tapes, photos, and final works of eden ahbez are in Romersa’s possession.

Ahbez died in 1995 at the age of 86, of injuries sustained in a car accident.

(Wiki has a lot more info about him: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eden_ahbez
Info curated from https://www.facebook.com/sunsetblvdrecordsstory of eden ahbez)

It’s a crazy story but a hauntingly beautiful song!

Nature Boy
There was a boy
A very strange enchanted boy
They say he wandered very far
Very far
Over land and sea

A little shy
And sad of eye
But very wise was he

And then one day
One magic day he passed my way
And while we spoken of many things
Fools and kings
This he said to me

The greatest thing
You’ll ever learn
Is just to love
And be loved in return

And then one day
One magic day he passed my way
And while we spoken of many things
Fools and kings
This he said to me

The greatest thing you’ll ever learn
Is just to love
And be loved
In return