Category Archives: Conversations

Good chat with interesting humans

Bathroom Banter

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Recently, I was in a public restroom that had several stalls on either side of a long aisle.

It was crowded with lots of flushing and doors opening to welcome another visitor.

There was an obviously broken toilet on the right side with a large black plastic bag covering it, but women kept peering in before they realized it was not usable. If it were me, I’d have an “Out Of Order” sign on the door and taped it shut…oh well.

I was next up in the (not-very-long) line when a young woman, maybe in her early twenties, swooped in with a flourish of her long trendy coat, high heels, and designer handbag — way WAY overdressed for the setting of a public lavatory. I could smell the entitlement wafting off of her.

Impatiently, and with a pompously demeaning tone in her voice, she turned to me and asked, “Is there a line?”

First of all, I wondered why she chose to address ME…did I look like I was in charge of the line? I was just standing there, minding my own business.

(Let me back up a wee bit and explain my response–I was tired, recovering from a horrible upper respiratory infection– not Covid–and her “I’m definitely more important than anyone else” attitude simply rubbed me the wrong way.)

I repeated her question slowly, “Is there a line? — looked around and responded, “No, obviously I’m just standing here so I can meditate for a minute before I urinate.”

I then pointed to the stall door (the broken toilet) that was ajar and said, “There’s an opening. Go for it.”

And then I confess that I laughed to myself as she flounced in, only to immediately discover that the toilet was out of order and she had to back out on her precariously high heels. (Heehee)

Admittedly, this wasn’t indicative of my very best self, but it was so satisfying to put that haughty and pretentious little girl in her place, to maybe take her down a notch or two as she assumed her rightful place at the end of the line.

No cuts! Wait your turn!

And namaste…

P.S. Lest anyone think I am always this snarky- whenever there’s a child or someone pregnant, the unwritten bathroom code is to allow them to go first, but that was NOT the case here.

Your Little Boy

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“Do you know what YOUR LITTLE BOY did?”

“Grandma, I need to tell you about YOUR LITTLE BOY!”

It never fails to make me laugh when I hear both Angels refer to their dad that way.

It started a long time ago when I explained to them that not only was I their grandma, but that their dad was my little boy and he’ll ALWAYS be my little boy.

Ever since, and especially when they have some juicy gossip OR a complaint, he’s referred to as “your little boy”.

When he rode his skateboard sans helmet which is absolutely DUMB, Angel Boy 2.0 would call me and tattle on him. When he fell off his surfboard, I was told about it. When he ran through a red light, yup, I had a phone call.

“Grandma, you will not BELIEVE what your little boy did!”

They extract a great deal of enjoyment when I scold their dad about his small crimes and misdemeanors; I’m a constant source of entertainment: “DAD, GRANDMA WANTS TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT YOUR BEHAVIOR!”

Mom isn’t exempt either, but MY little boy bears the brunt of the scandalous chat.

This time was a bit different. AB is now in third grade and his sister will start kindergarten at the same school. Usually Dad walked him as it’s only a couple blocks away and Mom stayed with the baby, now not a baby. (This is a cool deja vu moment for both Dad and me, because HIS elementary school was also in walking distance, and it was a great time to chat and walk there every day.)

I got the phone call….“Do you know what your little boy is going to do when school starts?“

I literally had no idea.

“Because I like to get to school early – Grandma, you know I don’t like to be late — and you know how Dad and I race there every day and sometimes I win –and C can’t EVER wake up, YOUR LITTLE BOY is going to run me to school first, come home, and then bring C. Isn’t that funny?”

“Well, T, why don’t you just wait until your sister is ready and Dad will only have to make one trip?”

“OMG Grandma, you KNOW that won’t work! We have to leave at exactly the right time.”

The backstory is that Angel Boy 2.0 has always been an early riser like Dad (and me), but his sister could sleep all night and most of the day. Sometimes, we still check on her to make sure she’s breathing, but boyohboy can that girl SLEEP.

Her pre-school started at 9:15 and it was often a struggle to get her there on time. Kindergarten starts at 7:55 a.m. so she’s going to have to go to bed extra early to train for a new sleep schedule. There will no longer be an option to let her skip a day or two or come in a couple hours late.

The best part of this story is how much Angel Boy loves school. He can’t wait to get there and always wants to stay after to play with friends.

His dad loved to learn, too, and still does.

It’s markedly different than my experience, that’s for sure. I didn’t like school and couldn’t wait to get home. The only happy part of it for me was the night before when I chose whatever pretty dress I would wear the next day. There were always matching socks and ribbons for my hair.

Being a fashionista is a life long pursuit and I can’t wait to see what the kids wear for their first day.

MY LITTLE BOY had his own sense of style…

The original Angel Boy with Stella Rondo

Hearts and Sons

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My son is the classic dictionary definition of an absent minded professor (which he is). His beautiful brain has multiple trains of thought all speeding along at the same time, so sometimes, day-to-day mundane tasks fall by the wayside.

It was early morning and he had returned from a dawn patrol surf sesh. We were having a lively “discussion” about where to put his surfboard…”Mom, Mom, I’m going to leave it right here, don’t worry. I’m going to surf later, too.”

Whenever he says “don’t worry”, there’s an eighty to one hundred percent chance that it’s something I SHOULD worry about. I learned that after forty-three years of being his mom.

I told him I’d prefer it if he took the extra few minutes to put it away in the garage where it belongs.

This discussion took place as we’re standing in the driveway. It could have been today or a couple decades ago; some things never change!

We were at an impasse. Hands on my hips, I stubbornly stuck to my position that the surfboard needed to go back where it belongs or I would end up trying to lift up a longboard that’s twice my size. Something would break; either the board or me.

Finally, I said, “Look how much time you’re wasting. If you had simply put it up instead of trying to convince me to allow you to leave the surfboard in the way, you’d already be in the house eating your breakfast burrito!”

Well, that’s the kind of logic that works with him. He finally put his board away. Like I told him his entire life, he should take his arguing and debating skills and become a lawyer like his grandfather.

As we wrapped up a twenty minute negotiation, I looked down and found this perfectly formed heart leaf. I took a picture, picked it up, brought it in the house, and I’m looking for a suitable frame while my (annoying) child inhales his breakfast.

It’s all about love. It always has been, and always will be. That child IS my heart, whether he’s being annoying or not.

Everything Breaks

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Why am I breaking things?

In the last few days, I broke three coffee mugs. Tragically, one of them was my all time favorite wolf mug that I’ve had since the 1970s..and that really upset me. It was a perfectly shaped mug, not too heavy, with a comfortable handle and the ideal curved sipping edge, not too thick or thin. It had survived several moves and was one I used practically every day.

It’s not like I don’t break things from time to time, (including bones), but three in a row got my spidey senses tingling. Does it mean anything special? Is it a message from the universe? Have I been careless?

I had to investigate…but exactly how do we interpret our broken things? I could see an easy connection with a broken mirror, but three coffee mugs? It’s not clear to me, but I know there’s meaning in there somewhere.

  • Frequently dropping and breaking fragile items can be a sign that the universe is reaching out to you with an important message that you need to hear.
  • Breaking glass is considered a symbol of transformation and change. 
  • The shattering of a dish, cup, or other fragile item is a moment we can’t control. We are powerless as soon as it leaves our hands; how it falls, the type of material it’s made of, and what it fell on — there is nothing we can do to change the outcome.
  • Frequent dropping of things can be an indication that we need to learn how to let go of control.
  • Sometimes, things break as signs or symbols sent by the universe or our spiritual guides. These broken objects can represent the need for change or transformation in our lives. It could be an indication that something in our current path is no longer serving us and needs to be released or replaced.
  • Release it, set it free, so now there’s room for something else.

I’m not sure if that’s accurate OR is the answer that I’ve simply been especially careless and absentminded.

  • The next time something breaks, or if you’re holding onto broken things around your home right now, ask: what message do you have for me? Trust your knowing and what comes up. 
  • Thank the broken item for all its support and express gratitude for the joy it brought.

Sometimes I repair broken things to recycle as a planter, but these are too damaged. A little glue won’t be able to fix what’s wrong, and that makes me sad.

Here’s a pic of two of the three mugs broken in succession. The third one was completely shattered so I immediately tossed it because there were sharp little shards everywhere.

Eleven Ways to Speak Kindly to Children | Positive Parenting

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I think we all need a gentle reminder to speak kindly to our beautiful little ones. These positive and nurturing messages should be repeated over and over again.

A great idea is to print this graphic and post it on the refrigerator. Turn it into a conversation where other encouraging messages can be added to the list to foster self-compassion and self-love.

Day of Reckoning | Doomsday

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I’ve had a really tough last few days. My WiFi broke on Thursday– I mean really broke. and there was nothing that the telephone tech could do to fix it so I had to schedule an appointment for a real, live human to appear in person.

The even worse news is that no one can come until Tuesday. TUESDAY.

That’s a lifetime, right? Nowadays, to be without internet access grinds our lives to a complete stop. I’m not sure that it’s a great idea to be so reliant on this technology.

I thought I was really smart and tethered my computer to my phone’s cellular data until I got the message that I was using too much data, so I had to untether…unplug completely.

In some ways, this really feels like the end; doomsday, my own personal day of reckoning. I guess I didn’t realize how totally dependent I’ve become on the internet — in every aspect of my life. I confess that I felt a level of anxiety, stressed out because it was as if I was marooned on a desert island, cut off from the rest of the world.

I was lucky enough to still have a radio because I couldn’t listen to music any other way. It was like turning the clock back more than thirty years.

No computer, no social media.

I had disconnected from cable TV a while ago but no WiFi meant that I didn’t have Prime or Netflix or Roku and I was stuck with only a handful of local stations. Crazy.

I found a couple books to read but it didn’t take me very long to finish both of them. I polished all the furniture, I washed windows, I cleaned out the refrigerator. I worked in the garden. I actually got a lot done, much more than if I had wasted time on the internet.

Psychology Today says excessive use of the internet is known to negatively impact a person’s mental health. It has been associated with mental health issues, such as loneliness, depression, anxiety, and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. Cybersex and pornography hurts our minds, souls, and relationships in so many ways — it’s incredibly sad.

While the internet has completely revolutionized the way we live and work in the modern world and opened up opportunities, it’s also closed the world. I believe that, too.

The internet transformed communication, information dissemination, commerce, education, and social interactions in unprecedented ways, reimagining the way we live, work, and interact with one another.

In the old days, we used typewriters to write papers or letters — or we hand wrote them. If we wanted to read a book, we went to library — or the bookstore. There were no e-readers or digital downloads.

If we wanted to hear a song, we listened to it on the radio or we bought a vinyl record, tape, or disk.

If we wanted to watch a movie, we either went to the movie theater or watched whatever came on television, and later we had Blockbuster to rent movies, remember that?

Upon reflection (since I’ve had a lot of time to THINK) I think life was better because there was more one-on-one interaction. Being alive didn’t feel as disposable as it does now. We didn’t expect everything to happen instantaneously. We didn’t give up as easily on things. We didn’t discard things as quickly. We learned how to take care of them and mend them if they broke. We didn’t feel the need to rush out and buy the latest new thing that was being sold, and then obsessively track its every delivery movement. (That’s me.)

It hasn’t been easy, that’s for sure. I only lasted three days before I packed up my laptop and drove to the (empty) city parking lot to access their free internet.

This is where I am right now, sitting in my car, typing away on their signal. After this, I think I might hit up Amazon and look for a new table runner to accent my now beautifully polished and shiny dining room table.

The pain is real. How long could YOU last unplugged?

Bizarre Eclipse DREAMS | Snakes and Cats

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All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.
— Edgar Allen Poe

So far, the world seems to have survived the solar eclipse, but on a personal level, my dream state have gone on a path of complete totality — into the BIZARRE.

First, as I was drifting off to sleep in that precarious and precious few moments called hypnagogia, the transitional state of consciousness between wakefulness and sleep, I felt my kitty daughter Bandit jump on the bed right next to me. I mean, I literally and truly FELT her body. This has happened during several lucid dreams, but NEVER as I’m stuck in limbo between two worlds. I know I’ve said it before…my Bandit died many years ago, so whatever/whoever jumped on my bed wasn’t actually Bandit, but her spirit.

Just like before, it totally freaked me out because it felt so REAL. Anyway, to rule out it wasn’t some other sort of creature (ick), I turned on the lamp next to my bed and there was nothing.

The light broke the spell of reconnection, but as Bandit jumped on me, I remember she asked a question, the same one she asked the last time I had a nocturnal visit. I responded exactly the same way I had during the lucid dream, “I don’t know, baby girl. I don’t know.”

I went to sleep after that –no more dreams about Bandit — BUT the last dream I recall is pretty unsettling. I dreamed that my nose was stuffed up. When I found a tissue to blow my nose, a bunch of snakes emerged, but only from the left side. (Gross, right?) They were quite small, mostly black with a white line running down the length of their bodies. Details, yuck! I continued to blow my nose and more snakes emerged, until I forced myself to wake up because OMG, I couldn’t let my subconscious continue on this strange path (of reptile totality).

My heart was RACING and you can be sure I doublechecked the comforter and sheets to make sure that I wasn’t lying in a nest of snakes. EWWW.

After a cup of coffee, I started researching snakes coming out of nose and to my complete surprise, it’s not at all uncommon. EWWW again.

There are way too many interpretations of snakes coming out one’s nose to determine whether my dream was good or bad, so I choose to believe the more positive explanations:

“Sometimes it can symbolize transformation, rebirth, and renewal. Dreaming about a snake crawling out of your body could be a sign that something hidden, or something that has been repressed, is coming out into the open. It could also be a sign of a transformation or a new beginning.”

“It might symbolize personal empowerment. You are striving for goals that seem beyond your reach. You are receptive to change. It also points at the moon, intuition, and the feminine aspects of yourself. You will play an integral role in an important upcoming project. Your dream is a metaphor for great harmony and heightened awareness toward some situation.”

Thank you very much, SOLAR ECLIPSE, for the strange ramblings of my subconscious. As much as I love to feel the poignant presence of my kitty daughter, it breaks my heart that she’s no longer alive. With regard to the snakes dream, I’m shaking my head. I have no earthly idea where that scenario came from. I’m not afraid of snakes (except rattlers) so it’s not like I have an ingrained snake phobia or anything like that.

Oh well…it’s a bright new day, and much too beautiful to dwell in the shadowy recesses of my submerged mind.

Dream info curated from Dreams Directory and Dreamopedia.

Novalunosis: Word of the Day

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“The universe and the light of the stars come through me.” — Rumi

Novalunosis (n.) – The state of relaxation and wonderment experienced while gazing upon the stars.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

There’s some online discussion regarding whether or not novalunosis is a “real” word, but there’s no disagreement about the feeling of looking up in wonderment at the night sky.

Is Earth the only inhabited planet? With the vastness of the unexplored cosmos, is it even possible to think we are the only living, breathing, sentient creatures?

It’s an overwhelming feeling; novalunosis, but it can spark deep thoughts and conversations about infinity and the cosmos.

“The Cosmos is all that is or was or ever will be. Our feeblest contemplations of the Cosmos stir us; there is a tingling in the spine, a catch in the voice, a faint sensation, as if a distant memory, of falling from a height. We know we are approaching the greatest of mysteries.”
— Carl Sagan

Thanksgiving Thoughts

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While we’re in the midst of plans to enjoy a feast with friends and family, I hope we don’t forget to honor, and with gratitude, recognize the Indigenous Peoples.

“Will you teach your children what we have taught our children? That the earth is our mother? What befalls the earth befalls all the sons of the earth.” Chief Seattle

“When you know who you are when your mission is clear, and you burn with the inner fire of unbreakable will; no cold can touch your heart; no deluge can dampen your purpose. You know that you are alive.” – Chief Seattle, Suquamish/Duwamish (1786-1866)

Chief Seattle (more correctly known as Seathl) was a Suquamish and Duwamish chief. A leading figure among his people, he pursued a path of accommodation to white settlers, The city of Seattle in Washington state, was named after him.

Photo of people and tents and quote credit to Chief Seattle and Native Red Cloud Maȟpíya Lúta~Hińhan Wakangli. Photo credit of Chief Seattle from Wiki

Talmud Wisdom

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The Talmud (study or learning) is a compilation of ancient teachings regarded as sacred by Jewish people. It’s the link between the Torah and Jewish practice and beliefs. The Talmud is also a way to see and comprehend discussions between thousands of rabbis spanning centuries before the work was compiled and put onto paper. The Talmud states that the Torah was mostly written by Moses. That’s a LOT of historical documentation to absorb and think about.

I studied both the Torah and the Talmud at Sunday and Hebrew school, even learning to read and write in Hebrew, but I remember virtually nothing. However, with recent tragic events, this quote from the Talmud seems appropriate.

(The kind of things I remember is to look at the calendar and note that Hannukah comes early this year, December 7!)

The Talmud states, “Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly now, love mercy now, walk humbly now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.”