Category Archives: Being a Mom and Grandma

The Joy of Karma

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There is truly no greater joy than to have my sweet yet scarily precocious Angels in their car seats as we drive down to the beach, windows down, all of us belting out Karma by Taylor Swift.

They pay no attention to the fact that I can’t carry a tune; we’re nodding our heads and singing along with Apple music. “Play it again, Grandma!”

“Karma is my boyfriend.”

“I keep my side of the street clean. You wouldn’t know what I mean…”
(Picture us mimic sweeping with our hands.)

“Karma is a cat…Purring in my lap ’cause it loves me.”

“Me and karma are like THAT.”

“Karma takes all my friends to the summit.”

“Karma’s gonna track you down Step by step from town to town.”

Like Taylor changed the lyrics to her bf’s name, I also change the words in this line…

“Karma is the guy on the screen coming straight home to me.”

to

“Karma is my two favorite kids coming straight home to me.”

Time spent with these Angel Kids is a neverending tapestry of shared joyful memories, including singing with tone deaf Grandma.

“Play it again, Grandma!” And I did.

Family Friendly 🎄Holiday Movies 🕎

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What’s your family’s favorite holiday movie?

I liked It’s a Wonderful Life until I got old enough to figure out that James Stewart’s character stood on the bridge contemplating suicide. Somehow that didn’t seem very happy to me and I didn’t think it was the type of conversation we wanted to have with the Angel Kids.

If you watch Miracle on 34th Street, I recommend the original 1940s black and white version with Natalie Wood.

When everyone was here for Thanksgiving, our goal was to find non-animated films with real people. We chose National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation with Chevy Chase and my absolute all-time favorite, Elf.

My son, DIL, and I couldn’t stop laughing during National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. Neither one of us had seen it since it was originally released. A lot of the jokes were lost on the kids (Angel Girl fell asleep right away), and except for one slightly inappropriate part with a semi-nude female, it was slapstick humor at its finest, perfect for a precocious 7.5 year old.

The next evening we watched Elf. I always resonate with Buddy’s everlasting childlike joy and joie de vivre. He’s innocent and trusting, and the overarching message is that love wins every single time. Again, Angel Girl fell asleep immediately, so we’ll have to make it a family tradition and watch it again when she can stay awake.

My two most favorite lines in Elf are “Santa! I know him!” and “So…good news. I saw a dog today.” I say both of those lines year-round, and laugh to myself every single time.

New to me, but released in 2016, is A Nutcracker Christmas. It combines a love story and ballet, what could be better? Well acted and danced, it is a JOY to watch.

Since we also celebrate Hanukkah (begins sundown on December 7), I found a website that lists some family-friendly movies and we’ll watch a couple of them, too. https://www.verywellfamily.com/10-hanukah-movies-to-watch-with-kids-5208915

What are your favorite holiday movie traditions?

Shades of Gratitude in Monochrome

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Late afternoon on a beautiful day after Thanksgiving, these are my favorite humans standing in the sun-sparkled ocean.

No filters or editing.
#Monochrome-Madness

Holiday Recipes | Grandma’s Best Kugel Noodle Pudding

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Are you thinking about what to serve this year for family gatherings? I swear, Angel Boy 2.0 could eat kugel every single day. It’s his most requested dish but I only make it a few times a year.

Let me introduce you to one of our family traditions. My mom’s recipe is NOT vegan, but it can easily be adapted if you substitute eggless noodles and eliminate eggs. It’s just as delicious.

What IS Kugel?

Of German/Jewish origin, Kugel is a savory or sweet pudding built around layered potatoes or noodles (lokshen), usually served as a side dish. Some recipes use cottage cheese, sour cream, cream cheese, and raisins, but that’s not how we make it.

Our family’s traditional Kugel is the sweet noodle version. It’s to die for. Really. Spectacular hot or cold or reheated, it’s one of those recipes you can make a day in advance and gets better and better.

If you have any leftovers– which we never do — it freezes well, too.

Grandma’s Kugel

Ingredients:
One large package wide egg noodles (or eggless wide noodles)
One large can fruit cocktail in juice
One small can pineapple pieces in juice
One large can canned peaches and pears in heavy syrup, yes, you read that right
At least 3 Granny Smith apples, sliced with about 1/4 cup sugar and 1-2 TBS cinnamon
3 eggs (or not)
2 tsp vanilla
Approx 2 tablespoons cinnamon
Crisco (YES)
One lemon, juiced and zested

Directions: This is a good dish to make in advance especially if you’re also planning to make apple pie (which I am) ‘cos you can just prep all the apples for both dishes. The secret to this dish is a LOT of cinnamon. If you think you have enough, add a little bit more. More is better, trust me!

1. Cook a whole package of wide egg noodles and drain.
2. Add 3 beaten eggs with vanilla, 2 tablespoons cinnamon and 1.4 cup sugar ; it will be super slippery.
3. Add the lemon juice and zest to the apple slices.
4. Drain all the canned fruit but keep the juices; you’ll need them.
5. Mix together all the canned fruits.
6, Use Crisco to oil one large and one medium deep baking dish.
7. Add a layer of noodles, then a layer of canned fruit, a layer of apples, then another layer of noodles, a layer of the canned fruit, sliced apples, more noodles, more canned fruit and apples, ending with a final layer of noodles.
8. Pour over any remaining egg mixture, and a cup or so of the fruit juices. Be very liberal with the juice. It will all get soaked up as the kugel bakes.
9. My mom would dot the whole thing with a bunch of Crisco, like ¼ cup, which sounds gross, but I still follow her recipe. Some people use butter, but we don’t.
10. Bake covered at 300 degrees for about an hour or so depending on the pan size. Take cover off for final 15/20 minutes. Excellent reheated and/or cold.

Recipe by Enchanted Seashells

Featured pic is not mine, Found on Pinterest.

Tales of Brave Ulysses

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We finally had rain AND thunder! In the middle of a downpour, I absolutely forgot how to turn on my windshield wipers. I had to pull over and search for the owner’s manual to figure it out. That’s exactly how long it’s been since we had sky water! From last night to this morning, there was more than an inch of rain. More is on the way.

For some reason, it seems like a Cream kind of day, and I can’t exactly explain why I feel like this…

Ulysses, also known as Odysseus, is a character of Greek mythology. Homer wrote The Odyssey about Odysseus, king of Ithaca, who wanders for ten years (although the action of the poem covers only the final six weeks) trying to get home after the Trojan War.

When the original Angel Boy was young enough for nightly bedtime stories, we read The Odyssey to him (truth!) and think, in some small way, that it helped to encourage his professorial and writing talents.

Tales of Brave Ulysses

You thought the leaden winter
Would bring you down forever
But you rode upon a steamer
To the violence of the sun

And the colours of the sea
Bind your eyes with trembling mermaids
And you touch the distant beaches
With tales of brave Ulysses
How his naked ears were tortured
By the sirens sweetly singing
For the sparkling waves are calling you
To kiss their white laced lips

And you see a girl’s brown body
Dancing through the turquoise
And her footprints make you follow
Where the sky loves the sea
And when your fingers find her
She drowns you in her body
Carving deep blue ripples
In the tissues of your mind

Tiny purple fishes
Run laughing through your fingers
And you want to take her with you
To the hard land of the winter

Her name is Aphrodite
And she rides a crimson shell
And you know you cannot leave her
For you touched the distant sands
With tales of brave Ulysses
How his naked ears were tortured
By the sirens sweetly singing

Tiny purple fishes
Run laughing through your fingers
And you want to take her with you
To the hard land of the winter

Background: The lyrics are inspired by Homer’s Odyssey, an account of the adventures undertaken by Ulysses. This can be seen in the song’s reference to “naked ears … tortured by the sirens sweetly singing,” an event from Homer’s epic. When interviewed on the episode of the VH1 show, Classic Albums, which featured Disraeli Gears, lyricist Martin Sharp explained that he had recently returned from Ibiza, which was the source of many of the images in the song (e.g. “tiny purple fishes run laughing through her fingers”) and the general feeling of having left an idyll to return to “the hard lands of the winter” https://www.lyricinterpretations.com/cream/tales-of-brave-ulysses

A live version…

Enter The Vortex – No Help

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My frustration level is OFF THE CHARTS.

Here’s what I learned today. Since Angel Girl turned four years old, I needed a new car seat. When it arrived, I didn’t have too much trouble assembling it (although it took an HOUR) but I couldn’t figure out how to properly install it next to her brother’s. I didn’t pay much attention when Dad did it.

I read the cryptic instruction booklet and it was like reading hieroglyphics. I watched several YouTube videos and they didn’t help me, either. This isn’t unusual–I’m not very mechanically inclined.

I figured that our friendly police department would surely be able to assist me, so I drove to the local station. This is where the vortex of frustration began…

Guess what? Our police do NOT help to safely install carseats, but they said OTHER grandmas have come in asking for help, too.

The police department referred me to AAA.

AAA also does NOT help to install or make sure they’re installed properly.

AAA referred me to California Highway Patrol which DOES have a program to safely install car seats but they’re booked up through January 2024. That’s no help at all. AT. ALL.

CHP said the Sheriff does it, but they most likely are booked up too. I called to make an appointment, had to leave a message, and no one returned my call.

I even called a neighboring city’s police department and they don’t install car seats either.

After that, I called Children’s Hospital which does have a car seat installation program but it charges FIFTY DOLLARS per car seat!!!

Our local fire department doesn’t assist in installation or inspection to make sure car seats are properly installed.

The final call I made was to Safe Kids Worldwide’s Child Passenger Safety, a nonprofit organization, and there is no tech in my area. Also, no one responded to my email.

I’m exhausted from running around the dead end rabbit hole with my vain attempt to ensure the safety of the Angel Kids.

I eventually tried to install it but noticed there was no anchor with this particular booster-type seat with a back, and it seemed a bit unstable, so I took an anchor strap from the old seat and tried to attach it. I’m not sure if it’s OK but at least it’s not moving around and seems more secure.

And from the manufacturer, I read comments and questions from others who wanted information about no latch/anchor:  “Thank you for your interest in the Turbo Booster 2.0 Highback Booster Seat! Unfortunately, a LATCH system is not offered for this product. We hope this helps! – The Graco Team” Well…it doesn’t really help at all, because why NOT??

Friends have said I should just leave it for Dad to do it again but I wanted to make life easier for all of them when I pick up at the airport. It’s much less stressful to jump in the car and head straight home than to have to sit at the curb and wait for him to hook it up.

This says volumes about lack of community service and safety from the entities that should absolutely care. My very final outreach was a call to the community relations department of our police department to suggest they recommence their former program of assisting/examining installation of car seats. Not surprisingly, I’ve received no return call.

Frustration level? OFF ALL THE CHARTS.

UPDATE: A neighboring city’s sheriff’s office returned my call, I made an appointment for this morning, and their in-house certified car seat tech examined both car seats and gave me a few tips to keep the kids extra secure. It took less than ten minutes–peace of mind = PRICELESS. I’m still concerned that it took so much effort to get it done. I don’t think most people are as tenacious as I am, and if they quit too soon, their children might not be secured properly in an accident.

World Kindness Day

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This year’s theme for World Kindness Day is “Be Kind Wherever Possible”, to highlight the significance of kindness to be practiced all over the universe and in each part of our lives.

The motivation behind World Kindness Day is to focus on the positivity and empathy that joins all of us. A crucial part of the human experience, kindness rises above political, racial, religious, gender, and geographical limits.  

One of the themes of the Angels’ bedroom is “kindness” and I’ve hung these quotes on the wall, to persistently, if not also subliminally, get my message across.

I don’t know how many times I’ve had the same conversation with Angel Boy 2.0 about Rumi’s Three Gates, especially regarding his little sister…

Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates
At the first gate, ask yourself, “Is it true?”
At the second gate ask, “Is it necessary?”
At the third gate ask, “Is it kind?”

Best of all, Krispy Kreme is giving donuts away to the first 500, so I better leave now so I can get in line. I could use some of that sort of kindness!

Be kind to ourselves, and be kind to others.

Adult Regrets | Forever Young

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I’m not talking about the dark night of the soul burdensome self-condemnation kind of regret, but I was randomly thinking about how sad it is that when we grow up, people stop asking us who we’re going to be for Halloween.

There was always a great deal of excitement around this conversation, “Who are you going to be for Halloween?” or “What are you going to wear?”— whether we dressed as a witch or a ghost or a princess or a superhero or a pirate. It’s a way to step outside of ourselves for a couple of hours, to escape into an innocent fantasy.

Some might claim I’ve never grown up and that’s simply not true. There’s a difference between being childISHly puerile and one-dimensional as opposed to the open-hearted ability to discover and appreciate simple, joyful, childLIKE pleasures in life. That’s a good thing, in my opinion.

For Halloween, I’m never scary. I usually dress like a princess (of course) but next week I’m going to be a ballerina. I hauled out my sewing machine and made a longish sparkly pink tutu with a tulle overlay, reminiscent of Les Sylphides.

I’ll adorn myself with pink ballerina earrings (an unexpected treasure from Goodwill), my toe shoes and a tiara, so I’m really going to be a princess ballerina.

Je ne regrette rien. No regrets. Forever young.

Who are YOU going to be for Halloween?

Green MONSTER

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Have you ever seen a Green Lynx spider? I hadn’t until this morning when I saw this Godzilla-sized bright green monster watching me through the patio doors.

I took a photo and then calmly moved him to a safer (for him) location. Peucetia viridans, the Green Lynx spider, is bright green and usually found on green plants. That makes sense since he was right next to a young orange tree I have on the deck. It’s the largest North American species in the family Oxyopidae. The body was about and inch in length and the legs were more than THREE inches long. It was HUGE.

Green Lynx spiders are non-poisonous and rarely bite humans but the bite can be painful. Females, when threatened, are known to spit venom from their fangs (up to 8 inches). If venom enters the eye, it may cause irritation.

My DIL is deathly afraid of spiders, more so than anyone I’ve ever known. On a recent visit, my son and I were enjoying a quiet cuppa and some morning chat about the kids when we heard her screaming, I mean like blood-curdling screams, the kind that, if they heard, neighbors would call 911.

My Angel Boy ran up to see what was going on and I followed. Apparently, she had been on a Zoom call in AB 2.0’s bedroom when she noticed a VERY VERY large spider on his bedspread.

After we ushered her to another room so she could calm down and resume her call, we then searched high and low for the offending arachnid and couldn’t find a thing. I thought her screams might have scared him off, but my son said he actually had seen it before scurrying away and it was literally four inches in size.

We needed to keep looking because if there WAS still a spider in the little guy’s room, we needed to find and relocate it before bedtime.

I stripped the sheets off the bed, shook them out, and found nothing. We removed the top mattress and then the box springs and OMG, there it was, trying to make itself as small as possible in the corner of the bed frame. I didn’t have my phone to take a photo but you can trust me that it was one of the biggest spiders I’ve ever seen.

We ushered it into a box, clamped on the lid, and my son took it outside as far away from the house as he could, while I remade the bed and checked to make sure DIL hadn’t had a heart attack from fright.

I wonder what she would have thought of my Green Lynx with those scary, hairy legs watching her through the window?

Reading is EVERYTHING

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“A child who reads will be an adult who thinks.” Unknown

I always have a book with me, my son always has books with him, and I always have books in the car.

Any time I hear, “I’m bored”, my response is “go read a book.” I said this even before he could actually READ, to encourage the good habit.

Later, I’d tell him to pick out all the sight words he’s learned; it, he, she, the, but…and then we built on those skills by sounding out other words phonetically.

I love functional reading too, and often pretend (lie) that I don’t have my glasses on so I can’t see a recipe or directions and ask him to help me out. He takes the bait every single time and that makes me very happy. To be completely accurate, almost every time. There is that one time he brought my reading glasses to me and that kinda sorta called my bluff, but I simply thanked him for finding them and found a better hiding place next time.

Even his Pokemon cards spark reading skills. “I can read this, Grandma” and I honestly didn’t believe him (there were some big words). Of course I didn’t reveal my skepticism and when he read the back of the cards, truly read them, I gave him a giant hug.

Recently, driving home from the airport with everyone in the car, we heard Angel Boy’s voice in the back seat. He had picked up one of the books I leave on the seat and was reading to his sister.

We all looked at each other in wonderment because this hadn’t happened before. Angel Girl was intently listening to the story and we were speechless with the joy of it, as we’re all big readers who know the importance of learning to read.

When the book was finished, we praised his ability and kindness toward his sister, who asked for the story to be read to her again. And he did. It was a win-win for both of them. And us.

Reading is everything.

“Reading is the gateway for children that makes all other learning possible.” – Barack Obama